Improving Personal Influence

Improving Personal Influence
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Improving Personal Influence
I am sociable and I like stamping my authority and influence wherever I go. I find myself in discussions or debates (sometimes arguments and disagreements too) on such matters as politics. However, I end up frustrated and discouraged because my comments and suggestions do not influence people as much as I would want. I am determined to turn this around through how I present my ideas so that they influence others.
I should start focusing on understanding the decision cycle. Making a change requires one to go through six predictable stages as per the universal decision cycle (Newman, 2020). It is important that I understand the stage in which the people I want to influence are in so as to influence them effectively. For instance, people in the ‘satisfied’ stage tend to dismiss early attempts at change by simply stating that they are satisfied. Therefore, I should focus more on listening and learning so that I gain the perspective I might need in later stages.
I will dig and establish trust. People cannot allow one to influence them unless they trust him/her. I have understood that one of the smartest and simplest ways of establishing trust is through talking less and listening more. I will try using the 4A’s; asking open questions, actively listening, aiming well to ensure the conversation takes the desired direction, and avoiding problems (Kacprzyk & Fedrizzi, 2012). I believe I can build trust by alleviating the stress on the change that can result from a conversation.
Creating urgency; influencing people needs urgency because people readily confess that there is a need for change but they are not doing anything to ensure the change is achieved. I can create urgency by asking probing questions to help the target people to consider the issue, deeply think of what-ifs, and understand the potential consequences (Kacprzyk & Fedrizzi, 2012). I will use a sequence of simple probes to move the conversation gently closer to the real-issue questions like, ‘how m...