Relationship Analysis with the Aplication of Psychological Research

Relationship # 1: Maria and David

1) Maria and David met just after finishing a workout at the gym. David thought Maria was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen – and he marched up and told her so right then and there. Maria liked David immediately and the two quickly found that they had much in common.

2) After they moved in together, Maria began to worry that David may not be right for her. The butterflies in her stomach were almost never there anymore, and she didn’t feel as excited when he touched her. It almost felt more like they were friends than anything else.

3) Worse, David argued with her almost once a week. She personally didn’t like arguing, or talking about personal things. She liked her privacy, and it seemed to her David was always in her space, making her feel claustrophobic.

4) David felt like the little things he used to do to make her happy weren’t good enough anymore – she used to be delighted when he’d walk her to work, but now she takes it for granted.

5) Maria often got frustrated when she would email David about something serious and he misunderstood her meaning, thinking she was being sarcastic. As far as she could tell, her messages were perfectly clear! She often felt that people she had just met understood her better than David did.

6) Maria was starting to notice other attractive men around (where had they been before?), and began flirting with the good looking men at work. After all, she might not be in this relationship forever…

Relationship # 2: James and Susan

1) James had no qualms about commitment. He had always found others –his family and past girlfriends – to be trustworthy. Plus, his relationship with Susan was the perfect mix of great sexual chemistry and real emotional connection.

2) James felt their relationship was much better than those of his friends and coworkers, and he planned to stay with Susan forever. His friends weren’t so sure what was so great about Susan, but James certainly seemed enthusiastic about her.

3) James’ main complaint was that Susan could be extremely sensitive and a bit clingy. This week, he had worked late with a female coworker, and Susan had freaked out, saying that he was always trying to hurt her by flirting with every attractive woman in sight.

4) Sometimes James is confused about how Susan interprets his behavior. She seems to assume the worst about James’ intentions.

5) James also had a hard time understanding why Susan seemed resentful about how much more she contributed to household tasks, when James felt certain that it was him who did the majority of the cooking and cleaning. He felt that she was trying to take credit to look like a good partner. Susan thought the same thing about James, but was certain that she had actually contributed more.

6) Susan adored James most of the time, but sometimes when she was in a bad mood or had had a hard day, his behavior would really irritate her and she would wonder why she was attracted to him in the first place.

7) Both Susan and James felt that this relationship was worth working on, and if they ever got into any real problems, they would go see a counselor to try and fix things. Why lose all the work they had put in?