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Literature & Language
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Peer Review: Dhilan Deodat. Literature & Language Coursework (Coursework Sample)


read the essay, and finish the sheet. answer the question briefly. Only use one sentence for each question is fine


specific page numbers and specific sentences on those pages. You must give detailed answers. Answers which are vague, general, and unhelpful (i.e., she analyzes quotes well") will be considered incomplete.
DO NOT BE NICE. Peer review does not work when you tell your classmate that his or her paper is clear and easy to understand No one’s writing is perfect, and we all need revision Do not hesitate to tell your classmate about strengths in her writing, but spend . die bulk of your time identifying weaknesses in her paper and making suggestions for revision,
Please be respectful of your peer’s hard work. Comments that are unduly harsh are unnecessary and unhelpful
To the Writer:
^ou n^11 hand in your partner’s peer review sheet with your final draft paper d USe £ conunents y°u receive 111 Peer review to rethink and revise yourLook at your classmate’s introduction. Does your classmate’s introduction include the title of the essays he or she will be discussing? Does the introduction include the authors who wrote the essays?2. Can you find this paper’s thesis (it may not be in the introduction)? Write, in your own words, what you believe this paper is trying to accomplish. If you cannot identify this paper’s thesis, be sure to tell your partner that here.3. Does your classmate’s project answer the essay question? If not, why not? Is the argument specificl Can this argument be supported by BOTH texts? List two points

regarding his or her argument that your classmate might consider when revising his or her paper. These points may best be phrased as questions.I2)4. Does your classmate’s paper include personal narrative? If so, find those sections, circle mem, and wnte “PN” in the margins. Does your classmate’s paper contain summary of the assigned text? If so, find those sections, circle them, and write “S” in the margins.
5. Is your partner using quotation from the texts to support his or her argument? Does
quotation appear in each paragraph of the paper? If not, suggest some possible quotations for your partner’s paper hare:6. Review each quotation your partner includes in his or her essay, then answer the following questions:
* Is each quotation introduced? List any quotations that are not introduced (be sure to give a page number and paragraph).

Is each quotation cited? List any quotations that are not cited here (be sure to give a page number and paragraph).■ Is each quotation analyzed? Is each quotation followed by at least two sentences that tell the reader how the quoted materiel works and why it is important. Tell your partner which quotations still need to be analyzed.Tell your partner what formatting changes need to be made here:


Peer Review: Dhilan Deodat
1 Title and authors in the introduction:
Dhilan Deodat has included both the titles and the authors of the essays being discussed. They are “Crazy Rich Identities” by Kwame Anthony Appiah and “Jon Ronson: How the Online Hate Mob Set its Sights on Me” by Jon Ronson.
2 Thesis and the subject of the paper:
Dhilan Deodat has included a thesis in this paper. This paper explores the limitations of individual rights of citizens while pointing out the benefits gained through public and government intervention. The author criticises the CMIO system in Appiah’s Crazy Rich Identities, and the role of the social justice activists on Twitter in Ronson’s How the Online Hate Mob Set its Sights on Me. On one hand, individual rights are violated when the government insists on promoting racial harmony to people outside the stipulated races, while on the other, social justice activists may violate other people’s rights by incorrectly identifying the wrong people on Twitter, and the wrong people may end defamed and with tarnished names. The author also discusses the benefits gained.

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